General Riddles

He has married many women, but has never been married. Who is he?
A priest.

First, you kill me with a knife and then you chop me in anger. Then you cry beside me. Who am I?

A man is pushing his car along the road when he comes to a hotel. He shouts, "I'm bankrupt!" Why?
He was playing Monopoly.

I am an eight letter standard word used by almost everybody. If you take away two alphabets from me I will make a logical sequence. Who am I?
STANDARD

Does the government of Texas permit a man to marry his widow's sister?
No question of legitimacy, because the man is already dead!

Paul's height is six feet, he's an assistant at a butcher's shop, and wears size 9 shoes. What does he weigh?

What is the beginning of eternity, the end of time and space, the start of every end, and the end of every race?
The letter 'E'.

What happens when an elephant sits on a chair?
It's time to buy a new chair!

Decode the following message: AENDFNDFNNIRDERDESIIEIIEAEND
A friend in need is a friend indeed. Explanation: Write the alphabets in four rows for example:

Tim came second in Math. When his mother asked him how much he had scored, he answered that he got the sum of the first 9 even numbers. His mother immediately worked out the answer. How much had he scored in Math?
90 Explanation: Sum = (n x n) + n Hence, 9 x 9 = 81 + 9 = 90

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