General Riddles

I am a seven letter word. I am very heavy. Take away two letters from me and you will get 8. Take away one letter from me and you will get 80. Who am I?

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Weighty
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What is the closest relationship my son can have has with my brother's niece's father's brother's mother?

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She can be my son's grandmother.
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Sometimes I am bigger than you and sometimes I am smaller than you. Sometimes I follow you and sometimes you follow me. I don't have any weight. Who am I?

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Your shadow
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The more I am present, the less you can see. Who am I?

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Darkness.
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I am clean when I look black and dirty when I look white. Who am I?

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Blackboard
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How can you lift a hippopotamus with one hand?

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You won't find a hippo having one hand!
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Name four days of the week starting with the alphabet "T".

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Tuesday, Thursday, Today and Tomorrow
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I'm sometimes white, But most often I'm black. I take you there, But never bring you back. What am I?

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A hearse.
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Does the government of Texas permit a man to marry his widow's sister?

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No question of legitimacy, because the man is already dead!
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What happens when an elephant sits on a chair?

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It's time to buy a new chair!
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